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Cheap options for expensive desires!

To desire something is a sin, but there’s nothing wrong with dreaming. The problem: It’s usually ridiculously expensive to make your dreams come true! Or is it?

Expensive Desire: As a child you always dreamed of becoming a skydiving soldier. The soldier-thing never ended up happening, but you still dream of falling out of an aeroplane and gliding on the airwaves before you pull the cord at the exact, perfect time so that you can be pulled-up for a brief moment and then softly glide down towards the ground. This is a valuable dream: Nobody has as much bragging rights as a person that jumped out of an aeroplane thousands of feet above the ground. But skydiving lessons, the necessary equipment and skydiving itself is very expensive.
Cheaper Option: Bungee jumping is a much cheaper alternative. The same amount of adrenaline will pump through your system when you jump off a bridge as when you jump out of an aeroplane. You don’t need to take any lessons beforehand or buy any equipment. To bungee jump costs a few hundred rand per jump, but if you are prepared to jump off a bridge completely naked, it costs nothing!

Sports car
Expensive Desire: Who hasn’t dreamt of driving around in a snazzy sports car? But you can’t even afford a month’s car payment on a Lamborghini or Maserati, never mind buying the car! But remember: Fulfilling your dream lies in being able to experience it rather than own it. The answer to your sports car dream is simple: Test drive one.
Cheaper Option: Your closest sports car dealership won’t just allow you to take that little red number in the corner for a spin for no reason. Technique is needed here. Dress-up wearing a neat pair of pants with a sports jacket on, or anything that will make you look like you inherited a lot of money. Walk with a don’t-care-attitude into a car dealership. (Your wife will want to go with. It’s okay, but only if she hangs on your arm like a handbag and looks like she married you for your money.)

Saunter towards the little red number, ignore the salesman who diligently walks beside you, take your sunglasses off and look at the car as if it’s not really love at first sight. Walk around the car and kick-kick against the wheels. Don’t say anything about the seven-digit figures that is stuck on the windshield.

Turn to the salesman and ask something along these lines: “Do you have it in yellow?” or “How long is the waiting list?” This will entice him to offer you a test drive in your dream car. Just think: For half an hour you can drive around with the wife of your dreams in a sports car that you can pretend is yours.

Sex with a filmstar/model
Expensive Desire: A man is a man and what man doesn’t want to fool around under the sheets with Charlize Theron or Kate Moss? Not that you would really want to exchange the love of your life with anybody else . . .
Cheaper Option: You may lose a few popularity points if you call your wife “”Charlize” during sex, but she will understand that roleplaying plays an active and exciting part in your sex life and may just agree to wear a blonde wig once or twice for you. You will have to play your part too, but how hard can it be to pretend you are George Clooney or Brad Pitt?

A huge television screen
Expensive Desire: It’s most likely every man’s dream, but it won’t happen unless, out of the blue, you find out that you had some rich oil magnate of an uncle that died due to a heart attack and included you in his will.
Cheaper Option: For a few hundred rand you can buy a projector that you can connect to your television set so that there is almost a life size image against your lounge wall. A Rugby game will never be the same again.